You are both ordinary and epic.
I am both poor writer and lyrical master.
Let me praise you!
Let's have collaborative fun with your life story.
Here’s the deal: you provide some facts about yourself, touchstones for me to work with — quirks, dreams, major happenings of your life journey.
I take those, and add a little magic — a few narrative embellishments. “Creative license” in the best sense of the term. Nothing you wouldn't say or do, as far as I know.
I prefer to ghostwrite:
lend me your life,
I'll lend you my voice!
You choose the length and genre:
For $5 I will produce a 30-word pithy ode to your awesomeness.
For $30 I will write an incredibly credible article about some interesting thing you did that may or may not have changed your entire experience of the world.
For $400 I will scribble a touching memoir, following the narrative arc that got you to exactly where you are now, reading this web page.
For $700 I will compose a 120,000-word autobiographical tome, epically and fantastically accounting the trials and tribulations of your life in great detail and to the amazement of… some.
I'll show you the life you didn't know you've lived!
30 words — ode to you — $5
500 words — incredibly credible article — $20
65,000 words — perfect portrait of your truly fantastical life memoir — $400
120,000 words — spirit-encapsulating, legacy-leaving, meanderingly epic autobiography — $700
to proceed: email